BBOTSS Travel Logue - Part 3

Ahoy, ye scurvy dogs! I be sendin’ ye this tale at me publisher’s request. The adventures we be havin’ on Lexapidis be far from over, but we be needin’ to report in before me publisher be getting’ too salty.

When we be hearin’ there be adventures a’plenty on the island, I be deciding to go a ‘shore with five of me crew. Since I don’t be trustin’ Missandei yet, the rest be stayin’ behind for now. The loyal crew I be takin’ with me be: Red Face the Fierce, White Fuzz the Fury, Long Ears the Lunatic, Green Ears the Wise, and Blue Beard the Bold.

White Fuzz the Fury

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Long Ears the Lunatic

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Green Ears the Wise

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Blue Beard the Bold

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We be headin’ to a place that be called Valaria with Missandei. There she be tellin’ me crew what adventures we ought to be expectin’ on Lexapidis.

When we be arrivin’ at Valaria, I be thinkin’ I never be seein’ such a place. There be gold everywhere. Folks are not bein’ as civilized as we be used to, but they be fairly close. We be walkin’ into Missandei’s place when she be noticin’ me travel logue. She be askin’ me what it be, an I be tellin’ her how I be writin’ down our adventures to be sendin’ to me publisher for gold and provisions. She be tellin’ me that some one as legendary as me needn’t be scribin’ me own adventures. She be clappin’ her hands thrice, and out walks the strangest creature I ever be seein’. She be callin’ this thing Turceda, and be tellin’ me to allow her to be scribin’ me adventures. I tell Red Fierce the Fierce to be drawin’ Turceda while Missandei be tellin’ us about her island. I be handin’ over my logue, trustin’ Turceda to be keepin’ it up. Here is the drawin’ Red Face be givin’ me:

Turceda

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Black Beard gave me the logue, although he looked very suspicious. My master Missandei is merely concerned about BB being distracted while facing the challenges she has for him on Lexapidis. BB immediately asks, “You be havin’ a map of this island.” I take one from my pocket and hand it to him, telling him it’s his to keep.

Map of Lexapidis
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After handing him a map, my master begins to tell him the history of Lexapidis:

Lexapidis was originally called Goatman-Ruff. On maps it appeared as nothing more than a large rock. The native species is a tribe of mad goat-men who call themselves Ruffians. They live mostly in the mountains because they always considered this the best part of the island. Their stronghold is called Horn’s Bluff and is located on the northeastern horn of the island.

After a time, a new tribe called the Naomidans settled Naomida east of the mountains. It was named after their founder Naoma. They were a peaceful people who were primarily shepherds. Their enormous herds of sheep wander the eastern meadows. The Ruffians did not object to their city, because the Naomidans always paid them handsomely in sheep.

After the Naomidans, a new tribe migrated to Goatman-Ruff. These people are called the Charlottans after the city they founded called Charlotta. Their city was founded on the western horn of the island. They were renowned as excellent weavers and lovers. Over time, they developed a strong relationship with the Naomidans, due to the wool/weaving trades. The Ruffians did not object to these settlers either because they paid them in woven clothing.

After the Charlottans, a tribe called the Bonobans settled the meadow island off the southern shore in the name of their god Bono. Their high priest Amuhl established a series of religious rites in praise of Bono, and all of their efforts revolve around these rites. They remained unnoticed by the Ruffians due to the lack of passage to their island.

About fifty years after Bonoba was settled, my great-grandfather Lexandei became aware of the island. At that time our native land was falling under a curse called the Great Doom. Our people were desperate to find a new place to settle away from the curse. When Lexandei found this island with its primitive people, he decided that we should be able to conquer it. Our conquest was one of survival. We also believed that we had the right to rule the island due to our superior intellect and ways of civilization. Lexandei came to the island with his three dragons: Haydis, Tatus, and Peytenis. He managed to establish Valaria, before he passed away and the work fell to my father.

We are a peaceful people at heart, and my father Rhaegandei used peaceful means to bring the Charlottans and the Naomidans under our rule. Since we built one of the greatest trade ports on the island, we enlisted the Naomidans help in establishing a trade route to Charlotta. The Naomidans proved to be excellent traders, and managed to convince the Charlottans to open their own harbor to import goods from the western lands. Now the Charlottans handle imports from the west and we handle imports from the east. My father then commissioned the Bonoba Bridge. When my father passed away, we were very hopeful that we would be able to continue our peaceful conquest with the Ruffians and the Bonobans.

Unfortunately, all hell broke loose. Naomida’s founder Naoma left two daughters behind in her passing: Allerosa and Naoma the Large. Naoma had declared that Allerosa was her rightful heir, although she was younger. This was due to her namesake’s evil practice of eating Ruffians, Charlottans, and at times Naomidans. Naoma the Large, enraged by this declaration, stole Allerosa’s Charlottan lover and devoured him. This rallied the Charlottans, now under the guidance of Willas, to Allerosa’s cause. Allerosa’s lover was Willas’s closest confidant. Naoma the Large was driven from Naomida, and established a stronghold in Ruffian territory. The Ruffians allowed this because Naoma the Large promised to cease eating Ruffians. With Naoma the Large allied with the Ruffians, Allerosa and Willas chose to cease their offerings to the Ruffians. The Ruffians’s leader, the Mad Goat, commanded Naoma the Large to raid the cities for the sheep and clothing they had lost.

I decided that we Valarians needed to lend our support to the Naomidans and the Charlottans. The Ruffians have become bold from their alliance with Naoma the Large. They have begun to attack us from the Hinder Points, which are the mountains adjoining our city, and the Mad Goat has been capturing our people. The Mad Goat has decreed that Naoma the Large is the rightful heir to Naomida, and that the Ruffians are the supreme authority on Goatman-Ruff. If we do not defeat Naoma the Large and the Mad Goat within sixty days, he will execute the hostages he has taken.

Some of our best fighters were taken in the Mad Goat’s raids. We are not strong enough to defeat the Mad Goat and Naoma the Large. I have sent many diplomats to Bonoba, but none have returned. When I saw your ship, I rushed to the harbor in hopes that the gods had sent us aid. When my dragons did not attack you and you said you were looking for adventures, I knew my prayers had been answered. Although I do not know you personally, the legendary reputation of you and your crew precedes you. Even in Lexapidis, we have heard of your might. Please help us Black Beard of the Salt Sea.

Black Beard thought about the situation for several minutes without speaking. I could tell that the glory and riches he knew he would receive were tempting him to consider my master’s request. Coming to a decision, he said “Me crew and me be delighted to be helpin’ you lass.” I could see my master was greatly relieved.

My master Missandei told him, “The first obstacle is the Bonoban diplomats who have not returned. We must have Bonoba’s support if we hope to rid ourselves of Naoma the Large and the Mad Goat. Your ship will be safe in our harbor. I will set a special force of my warriors around your ship to help the crew you decide to leave behind guard it. You must collect those you need and make your way to the straight of Utoo. There you will find the great Bonoba Bridge. You must cross it and enlist the Bonobans’s aid. Find out the fate of the diplomats we’ve sent, and have Turceda dispatch your findings to me.”

Black Beard responded, “Aye, lass. I be acceptin’ this charge. We be goin’ to Bonoba with Turceda and be reportin’ me findin’s to you directly. You be sendin’ me reports to me publisher too. That way the scurvy dog be off me back.”

They shook hands. We are setting out for Bonoba in the morning. I’m handing this report over to Black Beard now.

Turceda be tellin’ it true. We be headin’ to Bonoba at first light. I be hopin’ my black heart publisher and ye readers be join’ us. Turceda be tellin’ me tale while we be explorin’ Lexapidis. Until next time, ye crazy scalliwags.